At times I have stuff on my mind that I want to share. It doesn't always warrant a phone call or text to friends, but often it IS something I need to get off my chest beyond a journal entry. So, here we are. Welcome to my random thoughts. Enjoy!
So I was thinking about a few things and wondering if anybody else could relate. I hear that confession is good for the soul, so here are a few of mine!
I LOVE food...and wish I could eat all the time. LOL!!! GOOD food brings me extreme pleasure and joy. But from the genius lyricism of Kanye, "Why everything s'posed to be bad make me feel so good?" Of COURSE all food isn't bad and all food that is good for you doesn't taste bad. However, it seems like the MOST delectable things are the worst for us. If I could just have a food free for all and still be healthy AND not be fat AND not need to workout, I'd be in heaven. But alas, at 40+, that is IMPOSSIBLE.
I HATE talking on the phone. Which is funny since my job and most jobs I've had for 20 of the 26 years I've been working have required me to be on the phone for 8-10 hours a day. I do what I gotta do for work, but outside of that, I'd rather not talk. Text, email, dm, messenger, anything where I don't have to speak words is my communication outlet of choice. I have about 3 people I don't mind talking to on the phone. The other kind of funny thing about it is, my disdain for talking on the phone isn't just because I do it all the time and I'm tired. Talking on the phone, or sometimes the thought of it, gives me a bit of anxiety. I worry about not being able to sustain the conversation, not being able to hear, and awkward silences. I LOATHE awkward silences. I communicate better in writing or in face to face conversation. Surprisingly, I'd even prefer FaceTime or Zoom over a standard phone conversation and I used to hate both! Lol...Since I've realized that I just feel more comfortable seeing a person's face during a conversation, FT, Zoom, or the like is way more enjoyable. (Not when dating or getting to know a new guy though).
When I need a confidence boost, I snoop. I go on my ex's social media page and look at the new wife and relish in the fact that I look better. Y'all. I know. It's shallow. It's petty. Maybe even a little mean. But it does what I need it to do. Judge ye not, cuz I know I'm not alone in these sometimes insecure, slightly egotistical streets. 🤪
I'm somewhat of a chronic procrastinator. Not with all things or all situations, but mostly when I'm facing something that makes me feel overwhelmed or sparks fear. I gets the job done, but this is definitely something I'm working on.
I might have a condition called Misophonia. I know I've talked about this on social media, but not sure that I've mentioned it here...Merriam-Webster says misophonia is, "a condition in which one or more common sounds (such as the ticking of a clock, the hum of a fluorescent light, or the chewing or breathing of another person) cause an atypical emotional response (such as disgust, distress, panic, or anger) in the affected person hearing the sound" https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misophonia. For me, this has increased since the pandemic. It seems like every annoying noise has become 100 decibels louder in the last year. Chewing, slurping, smacking, loud typing, and other sounds drive me up the freaking wall! I work really hard to keep my cray cray at bay, but it doesn't always work. 🤦🏾♀️
You have anything you want to confess? Can you relate to any of mine?? Share with me in the comments!