This is 40!

So I was thinking about turning 40. Why? Because I’m 40 today. Lol! Yep, today I’m the big 4-0. Right now, I’m in Mexico having the absolute time of my life, but for months leading up to this, I had all types of mixed emotions about turning 40. But, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m happy, grateful, and looking forward to this new decade of life! I haven’t written in a while, but today I wanted to share 40 important lessons learned during my 40 years of life. Let me know if you relate!

1. ​Neither age nor maturity make a person exempt from making stupid mistakes. Whether you’re 10, 16, 40, or 62, we’re less than perfect humans, so mistakes are inevitable. But, some are way more idiotic than others. If you believe age and/or maturity automatic stop your ability to make dumb decisions, I’m here to dispel that myth. I do believe being older or mature greatly reduces the chances, but it is certainly possible that you’ll wear the dunce cap a time or two as you get older. No matter the age, the key is to try to learn from your mistakes, so you don’t make the same one again.
2. Even though we live on the same planet, in the same universe, during the same time, we all have our own reality. It amazes me at times how two+ people can be involved in the same event, activity, or scenario, but come away with drastically different perspectives. The saying about there being 3 sides to every story; your side, the other side, and the truth has proven over the years to be 100% accurate. Many times it isn’t that a person is lying, but it’s that different personal variables cause a person to experience/feel/see/understand things in a different way.
3. ​What may seem like common sense or natural to you, may not be universal. Different personalities, upbringings, convictions, etc., may cause a person to do things completely against what you believe to be true or make sense.
4. Grandparents and teenagers go through the same invasion of the body snatchers program. Seriously, when parents become grandparents and children become teenagers, it’s a whole new ballgame. They don’t just adjust a little bit, they TRANSFORM! I’m convinced they are all picked up by extraterrestrials and transported to the same galactic training center.
5. Multiple things can be true at the same time.
6. To have success, one must work hard and/or be in the right place at the right time, know the right people, have adequate experience, have proper education, be lucky, have money, know how to get money, etc, etc... It really just all depends.
7. It is possible to survive trauma/tragedy/adversity and live a full and happy life.
8. Nobody has parenting down pat. NOBODY! It doesn’t matter the number of children a person has, how long they’ve been a parent, or what type of formal education they have, not one person has parenting ALL RIGHT!
9. Forgiveness of one’s self is JUST as important as forgiving others.
10. In the grand scheme of things, another person’s opinion of me doesn’t matter, ESPECIALLY when they don’t even know me.
11. No matter how angry a person gets, it’s important to take a beat and think before reacting in anger. Although gratification may be instant, the consequences of knee jerk behavior could be far worse than whatever the situation is.
12. I will sacrifice convenience/luxury for peace. A peaceful home and a peace of mind are two of my most valuable possessions,
13. Opinions really hold no weight if the person has never personally experienced that which they have such a strong opinion about.
14. Good credit is major key. I wish this was something that was emphasized more as far back as elementary school.
15. A person can love their child/children and not (always) love being a parent. Because that junk is hard. Perhaps the hardest endeavor I’ve had to take on in my life.
16. Humans suck. One must work diligently to not suck TOO much.
17. If you can read and you have working tastebuds, you can cook. It isn’t as mystical as we’ve made it out to be. Just read, follow directions, and season to taste.
18. Black people are phenomenally extraordinary and magical human beings. Period!
19. You can’t make 100% of folks happy 100% of the time. I’ve stopped trying. You should too!
20. Jesus turning water into wine is the first recorded miracle in the Bible for a reason! He didn’t have to do it, but I’m SO glad He did!! Lol
21. There is no surefire/right formula for finding love or sustaining a relationship.
22. Life is absolutely what you make it. A person’s choices determines their quality of life.
23. Radio and television and the subsequent evolution of both, are two of the greatest inventions known to man. Aside from taking glorious naps and curling up with a good book, there’s nothing I like more than being carried away to a different time and/or place through artful lyrics and creative storylines!
24. A quote from The Color Purple is appropriate at MOST times. Will I use one during this post? Could be, could be not. Who’s to say? 😉
25. No matter how many beautiful, exciting, and fun places a person travels to, there’s nothing like being in the comfort of your own home, in your own bed.
26. The good Lord takes care of babies and fools! And I haven’t been a baby for a long while. Thank you, JESUS!
27. People don’t value time like they should, especially if it isn’t theirs!
28. So many wonderfully drastic changes can take place in one’s life just by adopting a new focus and way of thinking. I’m amazed at how I got my entire LIFE by focusing on my blessings and finding lessons in life’s lemons.
29. Seemingly small and insignificant decisions/actions/words can have a long lasting effect on a child, whether good or bad. Many times it carries over into adulthood and can influence their interactions with other people, how they raise their own children, their mental health, etc.
30. Happiness comes from within and you must make a daily choice to pursue it.
31. Meals without meat are delicious and satisfying! I NEVER thought I’d be the one to make this declaration. I couldn’t fathom having a meal without some hunk of flesh! I’m coming up on two years as a pescatarian, with many of my meals being strictly vegetarian, sometimes vegan, and I’m LOVING it!
32. Love is hard. Like the love I talked about in a previous blog post. Click here to read.
33. There should be more peanut butter than jelly on pb&j sandwiches. It took me many years to get this right. As a child, I used very little pb and SLATHERED my bread EXCESSIVELY with jelly. It’s gotta be the other way around to be good! I could eat pb&j every single day of my life, with chunky peanut butter and strawberry preserves or jam!
34. You can administer wise counsel to someone until you’re blue in the face, but if they aren’t ready to receive and change, those good words are going in one ear and out the other. So as long as it isn’t something extremely detrimental, save that good breath, unless advice is solicited. Even then, don’t get mad if a person asks for your advice and still doesn’t take it. You’ll save yourself some frustration.
35. The Bible is FILLED with nuggets of sound advice. Things that are practical and can be easily applied to every day life. I’m beyond grateful for the tidbits I come across when reading or the things I remember at just the right time during certain points of my life.
36. What’s right for me, doesn’t mean it’s right for you.
37. Water+sleep= cure all. For real. Try it! I guarantee you’ll notice changes in your health and energy level with adequate amounts of water and sleep.
38. There is nothing wrong with asking for help. We all need it sometimes, in some capacity.
39. The most important attribute of a Christian is love. But, it doesn’t seem to be what’s most emphasized.
40. 40 isn’t as old as I thought. I remember thinking 40 was so old. I mean when I think about my parents at 40 and other people I know, it was just different. No offense, but 40 seemed old and stuffy! 🤣 It doesn’t have to be that way!