He Was Teasing Me!

So I was thinking about Bernie Mac (RIP)...I know it's random, but stick with me. I was thinking about his final joke on The Original Kings of Comedy (a joke that would probably be considered highly offensive these days, btw). Sue me, but I still crack up EVERY time I see it! You know the one where the the kid who stutters really bad goes to get on the school bus, but every time the bus driver opens the door, he ends up pulling off after waiting because the kid takes a long while trying to get out what he has to say before getting on the bus. After a few times, the boy's mother goes with him to the school bus and asks the bus driver why he keeps leaving her son and it turns out he's a bad stutterer too, so he thought the boy was teasing him!  Y'all...this is exactly what my dating life, I dare not call it a love life, has felt like for the past *16 years. Except it ain't funny! *From here on out, we'll refer to my dating life as Not So Sweet 16.

Not So Sweet 16 has felt like "he" was teasing me and I'm not even certain who "he" is; God, The Universe, Mars, Satan, Ashton Kutcher, I DON'T KNOW! What I DO know is that the end of every dating situation during the Not So Sweet 16 has left me feeling like I was SOOOOOOOOO close, yet SOOOOOOOOO far. As a matter of fact, as I type, I'm in the process of being ghosted. 😑 I've been so unlucky in love. I don't understand! I mean, I've got loving myself down pat. I've learned plenty of lessons and kissed enough frogs. I don't need anymore examples or samples or glimpses or prototypes. Don't get me wrong, by no means am I desperate. I have a full life and am not needing anyone to "complete" me, but I AM human and there are just parts of life, good and bad, that I long to share with a partner, not just my mama, my son, or my girls. I think 2020 has had us all seeking out a little extra support! I'd also like to have someone other than my mother as my emergency contact. LOL! There are parts of singledom I appreciate and enjoy...however...ENOUGH already! I'm 41 years old...41!!!!!! I need this part of my life to get poppin while I'm FAIRLY young-ish and while the world is still in one piece. I don't know if you know though, but lots of people are trash and "dating" is even stinkier trash. Overall, the process has not been fun for me. It's actually been anxiety inducing and more often than not, time wasting. And even though I said it wasn't, this ish IS funny. Not So Sweet 16 has been so ridiculous at times, it's pure comedy. A comedy of errors. A series of unfortunate events. At this point, I want "him" to stop teasing me and just send the perfect guy to me in one of those Amazon Prime trucks or something. Anything is possible, right??